The Things We Can’t Google

“All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is delightful to be back after a particularly nasty bout of shingles. A virus is an insidious creature that comes from we know not where, does its painful, itchy, kick-your-butt thing and then is gone as mysteriously as it came. 

There’s a lot of not-knowing involved, and that can drive us First World people nuts. But we get where by swearing at the rash? Cursing at the pain? Fighting the fatigue?

Um. Not just nowhere, but backwards. 

Which is why stillness, calmness, waiting-ness are the best treatment (besides the anti-viral and a pain reliever now and then. Yes.). There are just some things we can’t understand – at least right now – and yet we can still learn from them. (I had a number of epiphanies while trying not to move my forehead, but those are for another time.)

That’s our theme for this month of July: the things we do not know.

We’ve delved into what we know to be true. Now we enter the mystery, where the things we do not know await our attention. Personally I love me a good mystery. (While recovering I watched all 13 seasons of Death In Paradise)

Mystery … or Doubt?

I’ve noticed that many people with deep faith and commitment to truth still shy away from asking questions. I sense a reluctance to say (or even think), “That part niggles at me,” or “I’ve struggled with that for a long time,” or “What does that even mean?”

What happens – at least what I’ve observed – is one of three things:

• I shouldn’t question God. My doubts show a lack of faith, and I need forgiveness for that. Mea culpa! 

• I can’t deal with ambiguity. I want the straight truth – no gray areas. Give it to me. 

• It’s bigger than me. Whatever I’m supposed to know, God will show me. 

I’m thinking those occur when we confuse doubt with mystery. Neither of those is a “bad thing”. It just helps to know the difference. A disclaimer: these are just my thoughts. This isn’t Gospel! 

• Doubt arises in the mind, causing us to question what we really-really know. It can be scary. It can knock us off balance. It can send us scurrying back to what feels safe.
  • Is God real?
  • Is the Bible literally true?
  • Is what the Church teaches what I actually believe?

Doubting is what we did last month as we examined whether the things we’ve held true actually are. That’s healthy and nourishes spiritual growth – unless we run from it. 

• Mystery takes shape in the soul, causing us to wonder. To ponder. To tingle with the realization that there is so much more to explore. But without fear. Without a desperate need to solve it.

For the Fearful

One of the reasons I always ask a question in my posts is something Richard Rohr addresses in his book Things Hidden:

“We settle human confusion not by falsely pretending to settle all the dust, but by teaching people an honest and humble process for learning and listening for themselves. Then people come to wisdom in a calm and compassionate way.”

As my dear friend Loretta said recently when we were talking about a current struggle: “There is nothing like a good old long conversation with God.” Yeah, I’m thinking God loves a delicious discussion with someone who is hungry to know.

Why starve ourselves?

For the Unambiguous

In that same (wonderful) book, Father Richard says:

“The most authentic knowing is accepting not-knowing.”

It’s not like we’re going to not-know it forever. But dealing with a mystery in a satisfying way takes time. It takes wrong turns and red herrings. It requires confusion and frustration that eventually evolves into an aha moment. Even if that moment says, “This is something I simply have to embrace. And that is a beautiful thing.”

For the Spiritual Bypasser

I hope that doesn’t sound pejorative, because it isn’t meant to be. Sometimes we do have to stop asking why and simply ask, “What do you want me to do now, God?”

But when it comes to mysteries of faith, we need to do more than just shrug and say, “It is what it is.” Otherwise, we miss:

• immersing ourselves in the beauty
• bathing in the namelessness
• experiencing the immensity of God

This week’s question:  

As we continue on our journey together, we’ll look up in wonder and look within with not-knowing. We can only do that if we recognize our M.O.. So which of these applies most closely to you?

1. I’m afraid to question. It feels wrong.
2. I question everything. I want answers!
3. I figure God’s got this. I don’t struggle with it.
4. I love me a mystery!

Thank you for entering the mystery with me.